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Nice Guys Can Learn to Get the Girl Too
Well, if you consider yourself to be one of these "nice guys" whom these women all claim to be searching for, but you still find yourself striking out with
everything other than the very bottom of the food chain, then you must surely know what an enormous load of BS this is. So why do women keep it up with all this
mythical nice guy stuff? As usual they are speaking in their own little code, which of course women are famous for doing in order to keep men thoroughly
confused I guess.
The problem with being overtly nice or lap-doggishly friendly and accommodating around women is that it communicates the absolute worse possible kind of
subliminal message to them about your male status, namely... that's it's way down in the dumps somewhere. This is because nice guy behavior is NOT something
that women see men as suddenly "switching on" in their presence in some sort of well-meaning but fumbled attempt to impress them. Not at all. Instead, they
believe all this nice and sweet behavior is something that you've been TRAINED to exhibit by the other, vastly more powerful men in your world. In other words,
'nice guy' is how subservient men have learned to act in the presence of stronger men in order to protect themselves. ("I am no threat to your status as the more
dominant male... please don't hurt me... let me be your harmless, lovable side-kick..." etc.).
To females then, over-the-top niceness is little more than a red flashing signal of Low Male Status, and therefore... an enormous TURN-OFF to them!
It is very difficult for most women to develop any sort of sexual mojo for a squishy nice guy. Nature has hardwired the female brain to seek out the most
powerful male in order to produce the strongest offspring with the best chance for survival. It's the same reason why men have been hardwired to chase after
women who display physical signs of youthfulness, which of course indicates reproductive vitality, and ignore old women. And while male and female actions may
be different, their GOALS remain the same -- strong healthy babies to carry forth the species. "Maleness" and "femaleness" therefore can actually be thought
of as two opposite but complimentary STRATEGIES for reproduction.
In the service of these independent tactical requirements, men and women are powerfully compelled to behave in different manners in order to execute these
dissimilar strategies upon one another. The dance of mating and seduction in all creatures is linked inseparably to this biological imperative. Go against it and
you're flying in the face of millions of years of evolution... or perhaps its design, who knows? Learn to play by it's rules however, and you will get your share of
mating action!
So to help you out with this very subtle part of the game, here's my #1 "Nice Guy Rule" for you right now...
While you never want to actually ACT like a fawning nice guy around women... somehow, you always want to SEEM like one. Can you get a sense of what I'm
trying to convey here? The problem with being nice is TRYING to be nice in a painfully obvious way rather than just letting it sort of happen. It just ruins your
sexy edge to come across as too enthusiastic a nice guy. You only need to drop a few hints here and there using your behavior and attitude that you COULD be
one without making too big a deal about it.
See, when women imagine nice guys I think what they're really dreaming about is a man who makes them feel SAFE -- but in a very special sort of way that
preserves his sexual attractiveness to them. Actually, this is not all that mysterious when you think about it from the female perspective. To a woman, a safe guy
ONLY means that you're (probably) physically harmless to her. In terms of what you could do to mash up her emotions, well...that's a completely different story.
This blend of hot n' cold, exciting n' boring, safe n' dangerous is what most women are searching for in their relationships with men, at least initially.
So when you first meet a woman that you're attracted to, you need to establish a few non-verbal lines of communication with her in a way that tends to provoke
these first instinctual sorts of connecting-mating thoughts in her subconscious mind. To a lot of women this potential conflict -- this suggestion of sexual tension
looming out there on the horizon -- is the very definition of "chemistry"!
Nice trick you say? Actually it's not horribly difficult to communicate non-verbally. Two ways in which you can smoothly transmit your possible desire are
through extended eye contact -- and with the use of brief, non-offensive touches strategically placed here and there. Both casual when done correctly, but
unmistakable in their genuine pre-romantic meaning to her!
This is how you can present yourself as a classy nice guy without having the lousy low status male stain ruining it. You can further advance your classy nice guy
status by... 1) slipping in suggestions of having strong family-friends relationships -- a sign to women that you're "connected and normal", or 2) that you have
something EXCITING going on in your life -- either at work, as a hobby, or perhaps some recent travel adventure of some kind, etc. This makes you seem
adventuresome, involved, connected... hey, a really "nice" catch!
Add to this some of that deep eye contact to silently communicate a more-than-just-friendly interest in her, and now you've created enough of an edge to get her
heart racing! At the very least, this type of behavior will keep you out of the deadly "friends zone" by showing the courage to make your desire apparent to her
in a way that cannot be confused with the work of the desperate loser.
For instance, I worked as a pro photographer in the past. Maybe half a dozen to 20 times a year, I got to fly around in light planes shooting aerial pictures around
the Western New York area. Now sometimes when I'm chatting up a girl, I'll work in a quick little anecdote drawn from one of my old flying jobs... like how the
snowpack collecting on Lake Erie forms such beautifully colored cracks in the greenish ice sheets during the height of mid-winter, or something semi-poetic like
that. But then I make nothing more of it -- all done very nonchalantly. Nor do I explain how I came to be buzzing around the skies making such cool observations
in the first place. What am I involved in that would give me an opportunity to view this sort of natural wonder?
I allow little anecdotes about myself like this to ride as a tease for as long as I can without getting stupid about it. Sounds silly I know, but this type of deliberate
manipulation of how you present yourself can create just a teeny bit of mystery. Remember, your flirt is always a gift to her -- and most every woman is
fascinated by a man with an interesting approach. Curiosity can often capture a woman's attention just long enough for you to make a positive first impression. In
a similar manner, you can drop hints about your educational status, finances, artistic talent or whatever you want to put over about yourself without bragging
about it like a complete goofball.
Instead, you've presented yourself as a rare encounter in a universe of men that usually breaks down into sexless, boring nice guys or ultimately worthless (but
alas, exciting!...) jerks. No matter what other flaws you might imagine yourself to have, you can become provocative to her in a way that at the very least she
can't categorize as being "wimpy nice".
And as added frosting on the cake, coming across as an edgy sort of nice guy will open up a vast new playing field of opportunities for you because you've
suddenly become attractive to a smarter, more self-respecting class of women who won't settle for jerks -- but are simply turned off by the squishy-boring
variety of nice guy.
Which means that you can begin to operate with the certain, sexy confidence of the High Status Male!
By learning how to mimic key behaviors that women find attractive in so called "alpha males", Mike Pilinski overcame an incredible case of rejection phobia. His
resulting success forms the basis for the methods that he now teaches men. Visit Mike's website at http://0845.com/jxV to see his highly acclaimed e-books
"Without Embarrassment" and "She's Yours For The Taking: A Man's Guide to the Seduction and Enchantment of Women".
http://0845.com/jxV
I thank you for taking the time to read this short report and I sincerely hope you take action
and make your life happier and wealthier for the better.
JanuszJanulis
© 2003-2009 World Marketing Media, Inc.
About the Author
JanuszJanulis
© 2003-2009 World Marketing Media, Inc.
